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June 08, 2009

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Dan

On photo 3:

Glenn Kenny, reenacting the best scene from "Funny Farm".

Max

Photo A:

"This photo was taken shortly after Kenny was found face-down in a mountain of cocaine. Asked why he was dressed as a King, Kenny responded: 'First joo get dee money, den joo get the power, DEN joo get the women.'"

Photo B:

"Now, while Kenny did not end up landing the part of Joey Jeremiah in the hit Canadian dramady Degrassi Junior High..."

Photo C:

"I swear to God, his balls were like grapefruits!"

Matthias Galvin

Photo A:
"WHO IZ SEXY BEEST IN PIC-TORE!? IZ NIIICE!"

Photo B:
"Who's Henry Hill?"

Photo C:
"Yes, but what do we do, now that we HAVE the head of Alfredo Garcia?"


Unrelated: Would you happen to know anything about Yuliya Solntseva and her body of work beyond her capacity as Alexander Dovzhenko's wife?

Scott Collette

Thanks for including me.

Also, photo A: When Mel Brooks chose Richard Lewis over you for Robin Hood: Men in Tights. How did you feel?

And photo B: Not a caption... but was your father Peter Coyote?

Cadavra

Photo B:

After his classmates super-glued a pimp hat onto his head, Glenn tried to make the best of it.

Photo C:

"On the other hand, Curly would hold the pie like this, giving him a greatly increased trajectory."

jbryant

I'm confused. A & B are clearly high school yearbook photos of Tyne Daly and Patrick Dempsey, respectively.

C might be Federico Fellini.

bill

Photo A:

Outside the courthouse, Oscar Wilde faces the press.

Dr. Lappe

A & B:

Costume fittings for Swanberg's remake of Salo.


C:

Mr. Kenny talks about the time on the GFE set when he had to demonstrate to both the director and his young costar Ms. Gray, what tea-bagging meant.

Chad

Count me amongst those who don't get your vendetta for Swanberg. Your caption to get the ball rolling, "I think I've seen this guy on Gossip Girl" is worth noting since you seem to be chiding Swanberg for something that 90% of your commenters are guilty of. They simply don't seem to know Wallace Shawn for anything outside of The Princess Bride or Clueless.

Glenn Kenny

@ Chad: Okay, smart guy, YOU try working an "Aunt Dan and Lemon" reference into a caption for the picture.

I must say that cocking a snoot at my readers' supposed intellectual shallowness is a rather roundabout way of standing up for Swanberg. But whatever works, I guess.

bill

"something that 90% of your commenters are guilty of. They simply don't seem to know Wallace Shawn for anything outside of The Princess Bride or Clueless."

How, exactly, would you know this? Do you run across a lot of references to either movie on this site?

Tom Russell

To echo what Glenn said, I think the reason why there were so many Princess Bride and Clueless references in that thread has nothing to do with not being acquainted with a wider array of wonderments of Wallace Shawn, but because those were the films that lent themselves best to captioning.

That being said, I am surprised that, given how often swipes at Joe revolve around the sexual content of his pictures, as far as I could tell no one worked in a reference to the supposed sexual prowress of Wallace Shawn's character in Manhattan.

Brian

Also, Wallace Shawn is very winning, funny, and warm on GOSSIP GIRL. Just sayin', at the risk of earning the further ire of "Chad" for my intellectual shallowness.

Glenn, please keep teasing Swanberg-- I find it very funny.

bill

And, in regards to what Brian said, I read an interview with Shawn where he said he loved the show and hoped to work on it a very long time -- and he seemed sincere! Never seen the show, but still.

www.avclub.com/articles/wallace-shawn,26010

Also, a friend of mine saw Shawn at the campus boostore at UVA. My friend approached him and said that he thought Shawn was brilliant in "Vanya on 42nd Street", which seemd to really please him. So okay, he's maybe tired of being asked about "The Princess Bride", too.

Claire K.

I personally will only and always think of Wallace Shawn as the father of Peter, Rudy's pudgy young friend on "The Cosby Show."

Ryan Kelly

You... with your pictures and captions... lowering the discourse of the internet with your immaturity and lack of maturity and stupidity and lack of intelligence.

You should be ashamed of yourself.

DVertino

http://www.criterion.com/explore/top10

Check out Swanberg' Criterion Top 10 at the bottom.

Josh

http://www.criterion.com/explore/66

Seen this yet? Please comment...

Oh, and best penis joke? Thanks. I feel, perhaps inappropriately, honored.

Glenn Kenny

@Josh and DV: Gee, thanks. For anyone who doesn't "get" my "vendetta" against Swanberg, please explain to me how any sentient being can take in his callow, smug "pensées" on Brakhage and "Straw Dogs" and not wanna punch the guy in the face. Favorite phrase: "I finally had an outlet for all the good energy Kieslowski had given me." Yeah, great, see ya in yoga class, pal!

Personal to Steve James: Thanks a pantload!

DVertino

My favorite bits:

re: Brakhage - "it seemed like anyone could just fuck around with a strip of film and some paint and point the camera at different shiny things and make a movie. What was the point? And what could anyone possibly see in the work? Those questions are still worth asking..."

And from his intro..

“It’s worth noting that I have not seen the majority of the films in the collection..."

daniel a

I hear that Faber & Faber is putting out "Swanberg on Swanberg" later this year. Should be good.

lazarus

Daniel, I'm assuming that's a photo book featuring Swanberg repeatedly trying to blow himself?

Glen is irrelevant.

At least you're a good sport.

jbryant

I just learned on the Criterion site that Swanberg studied film at Southern Illinois University at Carbondale, same as me (I was gone before he got there). Now I kind of feel obligated to take a look at some of his work.

Tess

A.) Oh

B.) Dear

C.) God

(aka I'm bitter because I didn't win the contest. ;-)).

Tess

PS ~ my favorites included:

1.) Matt's "For the first and last time, Swanberg's filmmaking meets a basic Criterion."

2.) Bill's "He's still behind me, isn't he?"

3.) Josh's "If we move the table in front of that doorway over there, I'll be able to shoot his dick."

Tess

A.) "Looks like Glenn knows who Adam Lambert is afterall."

B.) "I will continue to embarrass myself in hats for years to come." (See: Tucson Weekend).

C.) "My wife may be lovely. Me? Not so much."

(...did I mention I'm bitter because I didn't win the contest?! Lol).

kennylustsjoe

Pic A: "Most likely to grow up to have a hard-on for Joe Swanberg."

Pic B: "Most likely to grow up to have a hard-on for Joe Swanberg."

Pic C: "Prophecy fulfilled."

Glenn Kenny

@kennylustsjoe: Anonymous commenters do seem to have the biggest balls, for some reason. Pussy.

kennylustsjoe

"Pussy?" Hmmm. You can jump out of "character" and call out for it all you want. But you don't want pussy. You want what you saw brought to orgasm in Kissing on the Mouth.

Too bad we don't believe you.

- Anonymous.

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