Slow down, pussycat

Lori Williams in Russ Meyer's Faster Pussycat...Kill! Kill!, 1965

A couple of my esteemed colleagues have expressed slightly guarded enthusiasm over the extremely shaky prospect that Quentin Tarantino will direct Britney Spears in a remake of Russ Meyer's 1965 exploitation classic Faster Pussycat...Kill! Kill!, but I can't say it pushes any of my buttons, personal or otherwise. Of course the argument that, for what it's worth, Pussycat got made but good the first time isn't gonna cut any ice if in fact a remake is in the cards. But really...Britney Spears. Who cares. Her cultural currency—which is entirely distinct, as I'm sure you know, from tabloid currency—is as low as it's ever been. She hasn't had a zeitgeist-nailing hit since "Toxic," four years ago, and it seems highly unlikely that she'll be able to ever pull another such piece of out of wherever she used to pull them from, or anywhere else. And indeed, her aforementioned tabloid currency is such that there aren't many followers of her exploits who would be inordinately surprised if she signed on to be a Vivid contract girl at this point. Now, if she'd opted to make a move along such lines instead of doing that insipid pile Crossroads back in 2002, that might have been something. But now? Shrug.

I know, I know—Tarantino revived John Travolta's career, and he could conceivably do the same for Brit-Brit's. Um, no. Travolta's turn in Pulp Fiction demonstrated that he was still a better-than-capable performer who remained quite able to turn on the cool. But, you know, he already had movie-performer chops, and boy, does Spears not. Whatever credibility she has is as a pop icon rather than a performer, and that will always be that. Having Tarantino hand-hold her through a turn as a loudmouth psycho drag-racing lesbian stripper will do exactly what for her at this point?

One is slightly reminded of that old Onion story, "Marilyn Manson Now Going Door-To-Door Trying To Shock People."

Comments

[Herman Scobie]

You masterfully summed up this matter in two words: Who cares? QT himself is drifting dangerously close to who-cares territory. He should concentrate on finishing one project before risking ridicule with one even more unpromising.

[Shhhhh]

If you have any interest (Lord knows, not me) in what it would look like had Britney Spears (circa 2001) done porn, all you have to do is check out some of Ashlynn Brooke's work. She's about as close to Hot Brit as you're going to get.

[Maxim de Winter]

The other small item of concern is that the originator of the role of Varla, non-actress Tura Satana, was terrifyingly physical, a karate expert who had self-confessedly hunted down and beaten or killed a group of men who assaulted her as a teenager. Britney Spears is, um, not.

[rodrigo Rothschild]

man, I wish Faster Pussycat would come out on DVD.

[Glenn Kenny]

Yeah, Maxim, the idea of her playing Varla is also ludicrous—if she's even vaguely "right" for any role it's Billie, the blonde stripper seen above, played by Lori Williams. Is it too cruel to point out that by now she's far too old to play Sue Bernard's Linda?

Rodrigo: There's a British DVD of the pic out that's not bad looking (it's where I grabbed the screen grab from).

[bill]

I'm hearing that this story isn't actually true. Which is a relief.

[Glenn Kenny]

Indeed. You know, I never actually thought it would hold up. But I needed SOMETHING today—this week's been one of those frustrating combos of thin inspiration and a lot of non-blog stuff that I have to do...

[John]

This rumor has been universally decried as nonsense (thank goodness). AICN--which pretty much has a direct pipeline to Tarantino via his Austin film festivals--even posted a story specifically denying it and pointing out Tarantino is deep within pre-production on Inglorious Bastards. They compared it too someone claiming James Cameron is off shooting Aliens 5 with Sigourney Weaver, despite overwhelming evidence that they are making Avatar.

It seems like a story made up by somebody with a superficial knowledge of both Tarantino's work (like, one veiwing of Kill Bill) and an even more limited idea of exploitation cinema.

[Tony Dayoub]

Sheesh... thank god.

Now will someone please dispel the nasty rumor that Robert Rodriguez has cast Rose McGowan as the She-Devil Red Sonja?

:)

[Dan]

I automatically assume any media news reported by the Telegraph is bullshit, but this is even more so than usual. Why would Tarantino even want to ASSOCIATE with Spears, other than trying to bang her? And why would he remake Russ Meyer? I'm sure he's a fan but I doubt he has any tastes for remakes, or sexploitation movies (unless they involve feet).

[Herman Scobie]

Now that Mel Gibson has decided to resume the Lethal Weapon series, he'll find a part for his pal BS. She doesn't look like a cop or a criminal. Maybe she could play a . . . paparazzo. Or would that be paparazza?

[Rodrigo Rothschild]

Found it. Thanks Glenn!

[cadavra]

You mean QT hasn't banged her already?

[Dan]

Cadavra...who knows? I could care less. Maybe he did bang her and that's how the story got started. But I'm leaning more towards sweaty fanboy fantasy myself.